It's that time of year again! FORT WILLIAM! I frikkin love it and just can't get enough, it's an amazing track, loads of challenges, physical and mental and once a year, the circus comes to town, with it brings a heap of fun, my beautiful friends and the best riding in the world. What girl could ask for more?
Deep down, I rode well, I was strong and consistent, I pulled it together for my race but was left with that lingering what if...what if I had the chance to ride full time? What if I put my eggs into one basket and threw caution to the wind? What could I do? I always know deep down that I could do so well and not just crack that DARN top 20, but go further and faster. Truth is, I love what I do and I love knowing that I can do so much all the time, but in the back of my mind I know if I had the resources that I could do so much more. Maybe one day I will bite the bullet. For now, I am happy to know that with the efforts and resources I have I am doing my best across a number of different fields in my life......and I know I am living, I feel it, good and bad and I am proud to have finished 25th overall, a few seconds quicker than last year. 
Contentment came after a battle with my inner self this weekend and on Sunday night, I rested easy knowing that with a lot of help from my friends I had fought my demons and did what I love with the people around me. 
When all else feels blue, the friends around you can shake you up, slap you around and make you see that the road ahead IS paved with goodness. With a few sessions on the water bomb sling, a few episodes of the Jerky boys, some fear of Mrs Thomas' afterbirth ghost, some good choons, a few cook offs and some beautiful scenery and fresh highland air I found my Jayminess again. It's not always about the bike, it's about blowing off the warts with a good ole BLOW TORCH - Got ooout ma door!
Thanks guys, you know who you are and I love you all dearly.
P.S. What does happen to people who can't cook - do they not just go hungry??
J.X
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